Deep Pressure

brave tree bridge // 2.29.20
Fallen trees, my balance beams
If I fall I'll be happy
because I wouldn't get hurt

I think about all the trees I've climbed
tall, dead, or fallen

I shift my weight into my toes
and turn slowly

I bend my knees and jump
even though I don't have to

a gentle step would do

but I want to feel the weight
of my small and shaky frame
hit the solid ground

not quite enough sensation

shallow stream, mere inches deep
if it rained more I'd have to find another way

I think about the waters I've crossed
swam, waded, hopped

I pick up my pace and leap
even though I don't have to

a wide and mindful step would do

But again I crave a deeper sense

Pacinian corpuscles awaken the soles of my feet
energy rises and aligns my spine.
I am now walking calmly to a space to be still,
vibrations communicating with my deepest senses

of being

I finally feel alive enough
to listen to my soul beckoning to me:

let it all go
you are love
you are light

fear. shame. unworthiness
self-doubt. uncertainty. scarcity.

I say a prayer for strength and sanctity
that I might return to this stillness,
perhaps next time with more ease

I open my eyes, empowered

My worries shrink as I remember,
I always rise
even though I don't have to

I am grateful for these tiny structures that allow for subtle sensations of pressure, allowing me to return to the present through movement.

Nature is a manifestation of god,

and that manifestation is love all the way.

Ram Dass

Immersing myself in nature, seeing the big picture, the Gestalt, reminds me of how small I am.

Bringing awareness to the body reminds me of how intricately designed I am.

Just like the environment around me, and we are One.

In knowing this, I am able to rise with strength and courage.

May you, too, rise, even though you don’t have to.

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